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Man Of The Year

(Alice Cooper, Eric Dover, Ryan Roxie)

I wake up every morning
6 o'clock I'm right on time
I eat a low fat breakfast
I tie a perfect tie
I kiss the wife, I hug the kids, I pet the dogs and cat
I never lose anything, my car keys or my hat

'Cause I'm the man of the year
I'm the man of the year

Never cheated finals
Or miss a day at school
My urine tests are perfect
My prostate is a jewel

'Cause I'm the man of the year
I'm the man of the year
I'm the man of the year

I'm never ever jealous
I'm never ever cruel
I'm a graduate of Harvard
Where I never broke the rules

The Queen made me a knight
The Pope made me a saint
The President plays golf with me
I made madonna faint
So why am I so lonely
Depressed and in despair
If I pull this trigger in my mouth
Will anybody care

It was the greatest funeral
I lied in perfect state
And later I will meet the lord
I'll bet he just can't wait
To meet the man of the year
I'm the man of the year
Stand in line to meet the man
The man of the year
I'm the man, I'm the man, I'm the man